Destination Wedding (2018)

I can see where a lot of people would not like this movie, but I would have to disagree with them.  As opposed to your average romantic comedy (which one of my sons has informed me is a form of cinema on the wane), this is a messy affair involving two people who are a little damaged and fearful of intimacy.  We can see why when we get a glimpse of the family he grew up in and she was involved with for six years before she got dumped.
Lindsay (Winona Ryder) and Frank (Keanu Reeves) meet at the airport, waiting for an eight-seat plane to take them to California wine country for a wedding. After they have bickered at the airport, the hotel, the rehearsal dinner, through the games and activities and the wedding itself, and are now back at the hotel, they are at the moment when love should be triumphing over all with a tender embrace. Not so here.
Frank and Lindsay are the entire movie. They stand out and never stop talking nonsense and complaining about everyone, even in the midst of what has to be one of the most ridiculous sex scenes ever filmed. But when Frank and Lindsey are annoying each other most, they still have an easy charm and a sparkling chemistry together. So if a quirky romcom is on the menu, think of this one.

Parenthood

Our only grand child, poised between her mother and her great grandmother, seems like the perfect theme for Mother's Day.
Parenthood is something that most people really do not get until they are there.  Even if you did some heavy lifting with the raising of a sibling for some reason, or you were a nanny or babysat a lot of children, you just do not have that exact bond with your own child.  I totally get not desiring children.  I wanted zero and my husband wanted four, and when all was said and done we had four of them, one at a time, with plenty of time to not press onward, but when you have already stepped off that cliff, you are beyond the point of heading back.  Yes, every child is one more human to get you up at night, strike fear in your heart time and time again, and who is your responsibility to get to adulthood.  But the feeling of parenthood is no stronger as more children enter your life.  You are or you are not, and there is no in between, at least for me.
As we are about to have another grand child this summer, I am thinking that it is the same thing with grandparenthood.  The first time is a huge plunge, a brand new way to be in the world, and once it happens, your heart is forever changed by it.  More is probably better, but I am still relishing the grandparent experience.

Crawfish Pasta

Tis the season! For a short period of time mid spring we can get crawfish brought up from the Gulf Coast.  These are rich, almost lobster like in their taste and this recipe, which is basically a scampi recipe with a bit of Creole seasoning and a cup of half and half, really high lights that quality.

• 1/3 c. butter
• 1 bell pepper diced
• 2/3 c. onion diced
• 2 stalks celery, diced
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/4 cup flour
• 1 teaspoon tomato paste
• 1/2 cup white wine
• 1 lb. cooked crawfish tails
• 1 cup half-and-half
• 1 tsp. Creole seasoning
• Red pepper flakes, to taste
• Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste
• 1 lb. pasta
• Chopped parsley, for serving

1. In a saute pan, melt butter over medium heat. Add the bell peppers, onions, and celery, and sauté until tender, about 7-8 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for an additional minute. Stir in the flour until the vegetables are well-coated and no white clumps remain. Stir in the tomato paste until completely combined.
2. Increase the heat to medium-high. Add the wine and crawfish; let the wine simmer out for a couple of minutes. Pour in the 1/2 and 1/2. Add the creole seasoning, a generous pinch of red pepper flakes, 1 teaspoon salt, and freshly ground pepper. Cook the sauce at a gentle boil until it is thickened and coats the back of the spoon, about 5 - 10 minutes. Adjust seasoning to taste.
3. Fold the cooked pasta into the crawfish sauce. Stir in a handful of chopped parsley.

It Might Get Loud (2008)

This was a really fun documentary about three guitar legends: Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin, The Edge of U2, and Jack White from the White Stripes and the Raconteurs.  So the 1960's, the 1980's, and the 2000's, all represented accounted for.
The film has at its center an unscripted Los Angeles sound stage jam session that brings the three generations of guitarists together, then branches off with personal profiles of each musician and their individual paths to developing their signature styles.
Page is the most private of the three, so his openness to the project is all the more remarkable as he invites the filmmakers into his London home to listen to his record collection and a side trip to the country house where the legendary "Stairway to Heaven"album was recorded.  He is very engaging and plays guitar throughout.
The Edge literally goes back to the Dublin high school where the U2 quartet formed as teenagers to highlight his musical journey, while a visit to his riverside studio reveals his unique, effects-laden guitar techniques and command of audio technology.
A trip to Jack White's  Tennessee home base reveals the origins of his minimalist, roots-oriented rock and blues style as he leads the filmmakers through his development as a respected musician and producer. It is just all out fun to watch and left me feeling kind of sad that it had to end.

Normal People by Sally Rooney

This is a great book, long listed for the Booker Prize, and well worth searching out.  It does a very good job of conveying the way trauma ripples across a lifetime, engulfing others along the way.  The abuse of children is forever.  This is a gentle and well written reminder of that.
The book chronicles the relationship between two teenagers in Ireland in the early 2010s. Marianne is wealthy and despised, considered “an object of disgust” at school, where “people have said she doesn’t shave her legs or anything.” Connell is poor — his mother is a cleaner at Marianne’s house — but popular. They are both very bright, Marianne openly and Connell secretly, which explains part of the popularity gap between them.
The situation shifts when they go to University.  Marianne’s eccentricities and open brilliance, make her sought after and admired. Connell’s blue-collar reticence leaves him friendless and ignored.  They slowly and somewhat painfully end their way to an adult relationship that is both satisfying and surprising.

Prayer Wheels in the Hexi Corridor

These gorgeous 6 foot tall prayer wheels were outside a Tibetan Buddhist temple in the Qilian Mountain foothills.
In Buddhism, a prayer wheel is of a hollow metal cylinder, often beautifully embossed, mounted on a rod handle and containing a tightly wound scroll printed with a mantra. Prayer wheels come in many sizes: they may be small, attached to a stick, and spun around by hand, medium-sized and set up at monasteries or temples, or very large and continuously spun by a wind or water mill.
Prayer wheels are used primarily by the Buddhists of Tibet and Nepal, where hand-held prayer wheels are carried by pilgrims and other devotees and turned during devotional activities.
According to Tibetan Buddhist belief, spinning a prayer wheel is just as effective as reciting the sacred texts aloud. This belief derives from the Buddhist belief in the power of sound and the formulas to which deities are subject. For many Buddhists, the prayer wheel also represents the Wheel of the Law (or Dharma) set in motion by the Buddha.
The prayer wheel is also useful for illiterate members of the lay Buddhist community, since they can "read" the prayers by turning the wheel.

Smashed (2012)

This is a movie about alcoholism.  The kind of drinking that starts in the morning when you don't have to go to work.  That ends late at night with neither of them remembering what happened.  When two alcoholics are married, they value each other's company because they know they can expect forgiveness and understanding, while a civilian might not choose to share their typical days.
This is a story that starts there, but ends with the wife trying to stop drinking after she throws up in front of her third grade class and ends up telling them that she is pregnant rather than sick or hung over.  The lie blooms and eventually comes back to bite her, and a bulk of the movie is about the tortuous road to getting clean and sober.
The movie is gritty, not white washing the disgusting things that end up happening to people who participate in this kind of hard drinking, and it is pretty painful to watch, but true to life.

The Blessing of Siblings

It has been said that one's siblings are the ones who know you over your lifetime.  Your parents are likely to pre-decease you and your spouse often did not know you as a child.  One may have friends who last a lifetime and cousins that you may be lucky enough to know long term, but for sure if you have siblings, they are going to have grown up and grown old with you.
I feel quite fortunate to have married into a family when my spouse's siblings treat me like family.  I met my husband when we were quite young, so it has literally been almost 40 years, or 2/3 of my life that I have known them.  Early on we were getting through school and starting families, but as is so often said, it really does fly by.  Now we are thinking about what we want to do in our retirement and supporting each other as we struggle with the inevitable things that complicate your life after the children leave home.  Through it all, I know that sharing the burden really does make it lighter and asking for help means that you will get it.  So happy birthday to may sister-in-law, who is really one of kindest people I know.

Louisiana Boudin

It all started with the pig that we get every year.  My husband always gets the organs along with the neatly butchered and wrapped cuts of meat, so we have a pig liver.  What to do with it?  That is where an upcoming Louisiana Crawfish boil comes into play.  Boudin became the obvious choice, and my husband embarked on making the traditional rice and pork stuffed sausage.  Here is the recipe that used at my house recently:

Makes 4 pounds [[28 pounds]

14#;  2 pounds boneless pork shoulder, cut in 1-inch cubes

3.5#; 1/2 pound pork liver, cut in 1-inch cubes

7; 1 small onion, chopped

14; 2 celery stalks, chopped

7; 1 poblano chile, chopped

21; 3 jalapenos, chopped [7 green peppers]

42; 6 garlic cloves, coarsely chopped

28; 4 tablespoons kosher salt [1 cup to start with]

7; 1 tablespoon ground black pepper

7; 1 tablespoon ground white pepper

3.5 tsp; 1/2 teaspoon curing salt*

7; 1 teaspoon cayenne

7; 1 teaspoon chili powder

49; 7 cups cooked white rice [less!]

7; 1 cup chopped fresh parsley

1 cup chopped scallions

4 to 6 feet sausage casings (optional), rinsed

Combine pork, liver, vegetables and seasonings in a bowl. Cover, refrigerate and marinate for 1 hour or overnight. Place mixture in a large pot and cover the meat with water (by 1 to 2 inches). Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer until the meat is tender, about 1 hour and 45 minutes.

Remove pot from the heat and strain, reserving the liquid. Allow the mixture to cool slightly, then put the solids through a meat grinder set on coarse grind. (Or chop with a knife.)

Place the meat in a large bowl. With a wooden spoon or rubber spatula, mix in rice, parsley, scallions and the reserved cooking liquid. Stir vigorously for 5 minutes. (Mixture will look very wet, and it's spicy. After poaching, the rice absorbs the moisture and much of the spice.)

At this point, you can feed the sausage into the casings. Poach the links gently in hot (not bubbling) water for about 10 minutes, then serve. Alternatively, use the mixture as stuffing for chicken, or roll it into boudin balls, dredge in bread crumbs, and fry in hot oil until golden brown.

Eliza Hamilton by Tilar Mazzeo

I probably would have enjoyed this if I knew more about Hamilton.  Not having read Ron Chernow's relatively recent book, which not only was well received by critics, but is at the center of the inspiration for the block buster musical, I would suggest that perhaps one with an interest in early American history start there.
The book takes place largely before the death of Hamilton at teh hands of Aaron Burr, who ruined both  Eliza's and Burr's chances at maximal happiness as a result of antiquated ideas about honor.  The book draws from an impressive breadth of sources, and shows what made Eliza, in the words of her husband, Alexander, the “best of wives, best of women.”
The thing that was most interesting to me about her is that she was born into a prominent Hudson Valley, New York family in 1757 as Eliza Schuyler.  Her young life was dominated by war, especially the American Revolution.  The book does encircle her family's contribution to the young nation, and a harrowing experience that could of led to her father's death as well as herlself.  She was the daughter of a general.  That war also gained her a husband, the hardworking, ambitious Colonel Hamilton, who later served as President Washington’s secretary of the treasury. The quality of their marriage is largely speculative, as she was not much of a letter writer, and she long outlived her husband, so had time to reflect on her role in history.  It is a short read, but might be richer if you knew more of the story to start with.